Wednesday, June 22, 2011

The time has come.....

At 5:45am yesterday morning our phone rang. Instead of jumping out of bed to get it, I sat up in anticipation and told Jeff to get it. I knew it would be our case worker. As Jeff talked to him, he gave me a big thumbs up and said "That is really good news." I ran down stairs to get the computer and checked for the email from the embassy. After choosing 3 possible dates for our embassy interview I sent off the reply. It was nearing the end of business day in Addis but they did send back confirmation that our embassy date is July 11!! My mind was racing and so was my heart. After 27 months of working towards this and almost 4 months to the day from meeting them, our children will be in our arms.

I will admit that I do not understand God's timing - we are in the middle of fire season so Jeff is not sure how much time he will have when we return home, plane tickets are double what we paid in March and our children have continued to grow apart from us. But what I do know is that I have learned so much in the unknown, with each delay, through the frustration and tears. I have had to trust and through it all my love for Kaleb and Emnet has grown, my prayers for them have been fervent and I have experienced God's sufficient grace. When you are pregnant with a child, you long for them. As they grow inside you and you feel each kick, you pray for them. They waiting, although painful, has created a longing for these two children that I am so thankful for.

I know this is only the beginning and I am under no pretense that things will be all joy filled when we return home. Adoption is born out of pain and loss. Although beautiful, it is heartbreaking and messy. Like in pregnancy when you near the end, you are so ready. You understand (especially after the first child ) that there will be pain, there will be sleepless nights and things will be hard, but you are ready for the new hard. This is how I feel. I am ready for the new hard and all the wonderful things that will come with it.

I can't wait to be looking at one of these again!

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